I have the strangest feeling...hello!

 It's almost like nervousness, excitement, joy, and unexplained fear. I've been gone longer than I ever thought I would be. Three months. Just fathoming all that these past three months have held blows my mind. Slightly on the "I can't believe I made it," level. It feels like its been forever, yet just a day. Isn't that fascinating? Oh, and hello! :)
This year (starting from I'd say this time last year) has been absolutely tough, incredibly new, and of course, because life is, beautiful. Most of all, this past year has been about self realization, becoming a more developed individual-no longer thinking and acting like a child. I have that liberty in fewer areas now.It's called getting old. ;)
 Graduating high school is a rite of passage, but it's a bigger one than I thought it would be. Because now, my job is no longer to study (though I will be doing that), but to pursue whatever it is that I want to do as a living for the rest of my life, at least as I know it now. Taking in hand this responsibility requires much more than just the "work" aspect of it. It's soulful as well. Or at least, it should be.
As young people beginning to develop, not as children but as adults, a phenomenon generations before us have experienced, we must look into ourselves, our hearts, minds, and souls, and decide what is it exactly that we want from life. How do we want to live it? What type of character do we want to have? And are we willing to do the hard work? All these questions for me have meant that I need to stop the work and look into myself. Not outward, not at someone else and definitely not into boxes that I might want to stick myself in to appear a certain way.
Now is the time to take our lives in our hands, with caution, with forethought, with wisdom (parent's and elders can be very helpful in this area), and with soulful action. This is no time for doing things "just to do them". Now is the time to do things that we know we want to do. This can mean different things to different people, therefore I'm not saying you have to go travel Europe or something, though I would like to do that. :) It really is the age of opportunity and it can be one of such power and fulfillment.

 Coming back to blogging is feeling a lot like coming back to myself, since the craziness has calmed down, the urgent hard work is over (for now), and that part is exciting. It's a bit nerve wrecking and scary because I want to really revolutionize my blogging, I want to really write what's in my heart. And that might hurt and be work to get out. But, I'm joyful because I can. And I know HaShem (G-d) has a plan. :) That might involve accidental rhyming. ;) Therefore, I'm very happy to be back and I look forward to getting back in touch with my fellow bloggers!

Constantly Swinging

copyright Simply Natural Photography

Long story short, I wasn't able to put my signature on the photo, please excuse the weird title and do not copy the picture. :) 

One day, I'll be sitting on a bench (preferably a swinging bench like the one above-I love swings) with my besheret (soul mate, the one G-D has chosen for me), laughing and loving and being happy. But for now, my job is to save myself-emotions, thoughts, body, and love, for him. 

It's no coincidence that there are thousands of teen pregnancies, and that when people hit the teen years they begin to be interested in the opposite sex. This is a time of physical and mental development, and a time of hormones and what not, really. :p It becomes critical to have physical and emotional boundaries, because though we are becoming adults, we are not fully matured mentally or physically. (Of course there are exceptions now and then-but I'm speaking generally, and as usual, from my experience and opinion :p)

It is important as young ladies to know what we want in a husband, and have an idea of what G-D wants for us to have in a husband. Anyone who doesn't "fit the bill", if I'm saying that correctly, shouldn't be given a second thought as an eligible mate. And those who we think are or might be eligible, we need to be very careful with ourselves that we don't start making our own plans or giving our hearts away, because unless we're absolutely sure that G-D's pointed out the one, we never know. Mr.Darcy, or should I say, Jane Austen, was perfectly right-

"A lady's imagination jumps from admiration to love, and from love to matrimony in a moment."

We need to guard our thoughts. I cannot emphasize this enough. In all my purity posts, I always place the greatest importance on thoughts. That's where everything begins. Remember, its natural to feel attraction and etc, but that doesn't mean we should run with it. 

And with all the advertising and influences out there to date and go with your physical attractions and emotions, its hard to stay focused. Focused on saving ourselves, on worshiping HaShem with all our hearts, soul, and might, and on preparing ourselves for our futures.

What is a besheret? Its your soul mate! Yes, there is such a thing! You cannot just marry anyone-G-D has set apart a person for you and you for a person. A match made in heaven, a divine match, meant to be, perfect for each other-all those expressions are true and possible. We have to wait for the person that makes them actual.

There's a person who's personality, calling in life, likes and dislikes, passions and dare I say it, looks, compliment and match ours. Yes, there will be differences, but they are to be worked out, not given up on. No two people are exactly alike. In my family, it is our belief that in a marriage, there must be complete agreement in politics,parenting, religion, and all those important fundamental principals and issues. Now whether he likes broccoli and you don't really doesn't matter. :p

Don't give up-in marriage, before marriage- it will sometimes be as hard in a relationship as it is waiting for one. There is no savior or salvation from natural life problems. No escape-we are constantly being molded and changed-developed and matured. We are and always will be constantly becoming.

"The Next Girl"

Who is "The next girl"? People, especially on television, say- "I love___ as much as the next girl" or "I'm as _______ as the next girl". I wish there weren't those expectations and stereotypes and boxes to be fit into. I hope one day the phrase "the next girl" won't exist because everyone will know that the next girl is an individual with a different personality and likes and dislikes. Everyone will know that just because something is popular or expected, doesn't mean everyone is actually doing it, or has to.

I'm not the next girl, and never will be. And I'm not going to be ashamed that I'm not. I'm not going to feel out of place or left out cause I'm not the next girl. And I'm not going to stretch myself to be the before girl either. I don't have to be something I'm not to be something I'm..not. :)

Just be Me

It's the year 5771, well, it's going to be...

I never can believe it when another year comes around. I never can be grateful enough for G-D's mercy, love, grace, and forgiveness. I never can stop thinking about all I've been through, overcome, and maybe not overcome this past year. I never can look at the sun setting on the first of Tishrei each year with complacency and non-chalantness. I never can find another way to say non-chalantness. I never can stop making up my own words. I never can stop rambling. :p
Yes, today at sunset is the first day of a new year (according to the Jewish/Biblical/Hebrew calendar) and it is a HUGE, I mean HUGE marking of time, a incredibly powerful and important season.
But what I am here to say is that I'm so thankful to HaShem, to the amazing people that have touched my life this year, to the amazing experiences I've had, and to have another year to do it all over again, but differently. Hopefully better, more G-D filled, but no doubt-no doubt- He will be beside me, guiding me, leading me, and showing me, as He does year after year. :) And of course I want it filled with happiness, with joy, with fuffilment, with learning, with growing, with embracing, but most of all, with TONS AND TONS of LOVE. Amen. :) I wish the same to all of you, my dear readers, whether you observe Judaism or not, I hope you have a lovely September to September :)

L'shana Tovah!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, I forgot to Mention...

Since I've changed my blog name and look, I haven't written a post exactly explaining why I changed my name, why I chose Observations on Becoming, and etc.

And yesterday, I forgot to mention that today is my 2 year Blogaversary!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so thankful for all my readers, and comments. I'm pretty sure I would have deleted this blog a long time ago if no one had taken the time to read my words and think them worthwhile. SHALOM AND BLESSINGS TO YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know bloggers usually have some kind of event to celebrate their anniversaries, but I haven't had time or thought to conjure something up, especially as there are already so many parties going on. So I'm just going to post about why I changed my name and all. :):):)

Akeret haBayit in Training was a breakthrough name for me-I had gone through so many, and this one was "the one". But earlier this year, I got to thinking that though I loved my blog name, it didn't really encompass all my blog was about, or really the main point of it. Yeah, I am an akeret habayit in training-learning to keep my home and be the foundation of it, when I have one. But that's not all I'm doing. And really I barely posted about that *blushes* I mostly posted about nonsense or my latest discovery in life-my latest revelation or what's been on my mind, about life.
But not just any kind of life- a life of living, learning, and becoming who HaShem has created me to be. I'm unique, but I'm still developing myself. Which is really a lifetime process, but there are times in your life when you develop more than others, and I think your teen-young adult years is one of those times, naturally.
As you see under the word becoming in the header, there's a word by word definition, which I complied myself from several different online dictionaries, because I wanted to really get across what I mean by becoming.

The word observations is pretty self explanatory as I've said before, but let me expound a bit. All my life I have been an observer, a philosopher. Like Mary Bennet in Pride and Prejudice *wink* But anyhow, that's how I've always viewed my musings and pondering's, and that's why I chose observations, instead of musings or pondering's *another wink*

Well, ladies, that's all! I hope this next year of blogging will be even better!!!!! And another shout out to all of you! Thanks so much! And last but not least, Baruch HaShem! (praise G-D)

What I have been doing :)

It seems not so very long ago, but when school ended and summer hadn't even began, I posted about what I'd be doing this summer.Now, since its about to head into officially mid-summer, it's time to post about what I have been doing this summer. How time flies! Before I continue you should know that this post was inspired by Eldarwen :)

Reading.

The thing I'm appreciating most this summer is time to read! I'm now out of books, but using Librivox to listen to some classics :):):)

Listening

To music, to teaching, to people, to the sounds of nature, to the tv and movie's [;)], to my dreams, to the call to work, to pray, to make order, to follow order, to change, to grow, to have FUN, to enjoy each moment, to live.

Writing

(Be sure to enlarge this by clicking here because its worth reading) Writing fiction, writing from my heart, writing for Him, wanting to write, learning to write, having to write, writing, not writing, writing in my diary... pretty much miscellaneous.

Posting

I thought it'd be funny to use this photo of two suffragettes posting a poster in New York city. Anyway...I've been posting a lot. Well, more than usual. By usual, I mean more than did when I was in studies. Which is perfectly natural :) I've been posting mostly on my book blog, and trying to post more here. But I have been enjoying it! I missed it-*sigh of contentment*

Sharing with friends

Most of us, I think all of us, have people we can be completely free and comfortable with. Our mothers, brothers, sisters, best friend, cousin, it can be anyone. To be able to just enjoy with them-reminiscing, laughing, teasing, inside jokes, and learning about each other-sharing- is such a rich and relaxing thing.

Having Visits and Conversation with Family

This past-time is close to my heart- I love spending time with people I love-laughing, talking, crying, sharing, joking, eating, watching movies- anything that reminds us of that connection of blood, history, or relationship. In my particualr family, I know that you don't have to be a blood relative to be relatives-I mean, one of the most important connections on earth is of husband and wife, and they are not blood related! Therefore-friends can be family and family can be friends.

Watching Movies whenever(almost)

This is fun. Usually, when you're not on vacation from school, you have to wait until the weekends or the evening, once in a while, to watch movies. But when you are on vacation, you can watch movies in the morning, afternoon, and evening, and late evening, and midnight, and afterwards. Now I'm not saying I do that- the time depends on the day. But I can watch movies more frequently and with less time restraint. ;) and of course, with people. :):):)


This is all for now-this post has taken me forever. Feel free to do something similar, and look for part 2 soon!

Observations on Becoming~ July 4

 Hello everyone! Two Monday's ago I said I was going to do something new last Monday. But I didn't get to it. And that was a good thing because I had this idea today. Every Sunday I'll post my most recent Observations on Becoming! If you are not clear on what observations on becoming are, an observation is a-well, the definition is under the word on my header. And so-well, the header is pretty explanatory. Me and getting into unnecessary things! That reminds me about this post....Introducing, observations on becoming.  (p.s-there will probably be a banner to go along with it...just have to make it, hee hee)


Men of reputation. These words were found in this weeks Parashah portion, Pinchas. It was talking about the tribes, and it mentioned Korach and his “assistants”, calling them “men of reputation”. Isn’t that interesting? Obviously, they were men of bad reputation. But, if you notice, it doesn’t say so there. I think that’s because when you have a reputation, its because you’re making yourself known. You’re making yourself noticed, forming an active idea (reputation) of the way people view you. So is reputation really something to be sought, whether its good or bad? Because then you have to live up to it or live it down, and neither leaves room for change and growth.

Perfectly imperfect. Some women, in literature, and perhaps even in real life, have the feminine power of charming and appearing without flaw-though they may often be very honest with their faults, that’s the very thing that makes them appear less faulty. How is this? I think its because, as Helen Andelin discusses in her books, A Fascinating Woman/Girl, the quality of child-likeness (part of which is innocence or exaggerated guilt) is attractive to men, and indeed most people of each gender. Hopefully I will be re-reading Helen’s book soon, and doing a chapter by chapter synopsis, and then you will better be able to understand what I’m talking about. J

Wordle is absolutely cool. I love words and randomizing them with color, layout, and etc delights me. My next step is to print some out. 

Sometimes my life feels unproductive and useless. I get overwhelmed by the million and one things that have to be, should be, could be, and I want to be done. How do we sort this all out? How do we shove past the unnecessary to the necessary? How do we determine what we should and shouldn’t be concerned about? Because sometimes its not clear. I think we can only ask for G-D’s guidance and our parent’s advice. Both I have found and will find useful.

 People are always looking for a quick fix, simple supplement, easy cover up, substitution, or even a distraction. For the work that has to be done. For the wounds that are opening wider and wider. For the hurt and destruction that is staring them in the face. For the consequences of choices, for the loss of dignity, for the inconvenience of taking responsibility. But all the cover ups and etc.etc.etc- slip away, fall away, and tear off at the slightest rustle or ruffle. But, unfortunately, the smallest ruffles and rustles are often ignored. It’s the big waves, it’s the rips, the pulls, the ginormous tugs that get those wounds to reopen completely so that they can be properly treated and healed. Get the courage, get the determination, get the discipline, get the faith, and do it.

Check this out!

Dancing in the Rain (blog party and giveaway) at Living On Literary Lane

Elizabeth Rose has completely redone her blog-and I must say it looks inexpressibly delightful. Now she's having a blog party to celebrate it...along with a giveaway! How lovely is that?! So go read all about it and enter! The button's on my sidebar so click on that for details. Trust me, you want to check this out. You really do. So, there are questions you must answer to enter the blog party, which by entering means you also give yourself a chance to win the giveaway! So...go!

• Have you ever run outside during a rainstorm (and if so, please describe it)? Yes, I have. But see, I was running because I had to cover up dirt and gardening tools. But it was still delightful, and I got drenched.Twice. And rain on a hot day is so refreshing and relaxing. Along with thunder and lightening. 
• What is your favorite Sense & Sensibility version: 2008 or 1995? Oh, hard one. There are good things about each. But I think I'll have to go with 1995.
• Do you keep a journal (and if so, how many have you filled)? Yes, I do. I don't know how many I have filled, but I know I have only finished one, and am in the process of finishing my second.
• What is your favorite thing about summer? People seem more cheerful and obviously active. And that everything is alive. But I dislike the heat. Just sayin.
• What is your favorite classical song? Oh, tough one. I'm just going to say Fur Elise because its memorable to me.
• It's your wedding day. And while you are going down the aisle (gracefully, of course), the audience suddenly bursts into singing "How Do You Solve A Problem Like ____ (your name)?" What are your emotions? Shock and pleasure. Because I would laugh, and I love humor, so it makes me pleased. Shocked because of course it would be a huge unexpected thing.
• What is your favorite scene in Sense & Sensibility? Is the same scene in the movie(s) (and if so, do you like it as well)? I think my favorite scene is when, after Marianne also finds out about Edward and Lucy's "secret", she talks with Elinor and realizes that just because she's reserved doesn't mean she's heartless.
• Which of Jane Austen's books is your favorite? Why? Sense and Sensibility. I relate a lot to Elinor, and I just love the style and homey feel of the settings. Its very family focused.
• Describe your perfect reading "nook": A window seat with comfy pillows for my back, and a view of a small pond with willow trees. But perhaps not because I'd be so distracted by the beauty ;)
• Have you ever been accused of reading a book when you were supposed to be doing chores? No, but I have read when supposed to be studying or sleeping. :)
• You are on the beach, and you are wearing normal clothes (NOT a bathing suit). Do you consider jumping into the cold ocean anyway? Indeed!!!!!!!!!!!!
• Do you consider yourself a matchmaker like Emma?  No way.
• What do you like best about my blog? What do you think is the worst? (It's always good to get feedback, so I know what to change and what to keep!) I can't answer either of those- they're too hard with such a lovely blog! But I can say I'd like a bit more bookish stuff. ;)
• What are your opinions involving letters: short and brief or long and lovely? Long and lovely, preferably. But short and brief can be short and sweet, so....
• What Scripture verse has encouraged you a lot recently?  That's hard to answer-certain ones come to me when I need them. But I'll say that the word "hope" has encouraged me a lot recently.
• Do you consider yourself an artist? If so, in what way? Yes, I do. I'm just beginning to develop that thought of myself. IN my photography and writing, and in my behaviors and personality. Though the creativity belongs to HaShem there, I express it, and I can do it artistically.
• What interests you in a blog: beautiful layout or good content? Both! Quantity of beauty, and quality of content.
• Do you believe in saving your first kiss for your wedding day? Yes :)
• What are your opinions involving modesty? The point is to express your inside outwardly. There's not one definition. Follow where He leads.
• Did you enjoy answering all these questions? Yes! Thanks Elizabeth Rose!

Welcome To Observations on Becoming!!

What do you think of the new name and look?! I hope, really hope you like it. I feel it truly reflects the mood and meaning of this blog. Anyway, I'll put a poll up, and do a more descriptive post later. Comment if you can!

Now that's Epic

*Click here for a synopsis of what Shavuot is*

Shavuot can be described simply in 7 words. Three important ones, and three not so important ones. :)

Celebration of the Giving of the Torah

What: Biblically, Shavuot is a celebration of the first fruits of the harvest. But today, it is also the big letters above. Oh, Check out Leviticus 23 for the command of Shavuot. We read the book of Ruth, we read the ten commandments and about the event itself, we do no work, and we eat dairy. Check out the site in the link above for more on that.
Where: Mount Sinai, in the second and third temples, in the synagogues, in our homes.
When: According to the scholars, 50 days after the Exodus from Egypt, on Passover. Also, after the counting of the Omer. Also when The Ruach haKodesh (holy Spirit) descended on the talmidim of Yeshua (disciples of Jesus) in the Brit Chadasha (new testament).This year, May 18-20, Sivan 5 and 6, 5770
Who: The Torah was given to Moshe and all the people of Israel. It is said that at that time, all the souls of those who would accept the Torah were there, from their unborn children to me (as an example).
How: With thunder lightning and voices on the mountain :)

CELEBRATE!!!! Its part of the commandment!!! : D
All the holidays commanded in the Torah are amazing and incredibly meaningful and beautiful. But, Shavuot is the day we formally received all those commandments and incredible holidays. The other holidays are BIG DEALS, but Shavuot? The giving of the holy Torah itself? A time when all souls were before G-D? When G-D was visibly present to all the people of Israel? When we received the guidelines for life, living, and human relations, plus so much more? Now that's epic.

I hope all you Torah observers have a lovely Shavuot, and to the rest of you amazing people, have a great week and I will catch up with you on Thursday night!

Little Notes....an annoucment

Some of you, or none of you, may have noticed my most recent note in the "Little Notes" section. Its like my own kind of twitter, when I don't need to do a post. Anyway, the note gives notice that I will soon have a new look, new style and...... A NEW BLOG NAME!!! Yes yes yes. Now, I should have it all set up (behind the scenes) by the end of this month, as I finish up school as well. Then as a 300 post celebration/ school's out/summer time/ personal reasons, all the above will be established.  It seems like dozens of people are taking blogging breaks, but I am about to do the opposite- because my blogs have been neglected sadly, for months and months now, so I think some of my time should get them at least to where I want them to be, so I don't have these ideas nagging me in the back of my head.

Anyway, just wanted to formally announce it! Tell me what you think...
Shabbat shalom and congrats to all finishing up school and done with it!!! Only 9 school days left for me!

Pure in Heart....

Oh my goodness! Lizzy from her Library, has awarded me, because she thinks I seem pure in heart. I am so honored, and definitely feel like I definitely don't deserve this, but, with only G-D can be the judge of that, obviously. ;) Anyway, I have to post this, and put my awards on the sidebar or something! I think I have 3...
Thanks so much, Lizzy!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you are tagged:
1. Post about the tag
2. Pick 10 bloggers who deserve this award
3. Leave a comment on the blogs of the people you tagged letting them know they were awarded
4. Answer the questions along with your post

1: Apples, Oranges or Bananas? 
Oranges have always been my favorite fruit......
2: How many siblings do you have?
1. Yup. 1.
3: How old are you?
This question seems to keep popping up! Look in my archives...
4: Do you live on a woodland, swamp, city, or other?
Suburb. That is a weird word.
5: Scissors or glue? 
Scissors. I can DESTROY THINGS with them. Ok Ok, I like them because they're sharp and shiny. Ok Ok I just like them. : D
6: Describe your dream house. 
Anything homey that I like. Yup. Oooh... lots of window seats, an attic, wrap around veranda...
7: Is your room clean? 
Pretty much...everyone has a different definition.
8: If you could be a movie character for a day, who would you be? 
I really don't know...
9: Italy, Greece, France, Spain or England? 
Spain, then England.
10: What denomination are you? 
Technically, Messianic Judiasm is my "denomination".
11: Do you sleep with a stuffed toy (BE HONEST!!!!) 
Nope. They sleep at the bottom of  my bed. Sounds freaky, I know.
12: Gum, chocolate, or jelly beans?
Chocolate.
13: What is your favorite book?
I don't have one...
14: Favorite ice cream flavor? 
Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough
15: If you had to eat one type of food for two weeks, what would that food be? 
Puerto Rican fried chicken and mashed potatoes. This is a fantasy meal...
16: What is your favorite Olympic sport? 
I have no clue about the Olympics- its much ado about nothing (covers head preparing for volley of violent comments)
17: If you woke up and discovered that you had turned into Miley Cyrus for the day, what would you do?
Agh!Wish I was myself again, buy everything my family and I need and want, and stop singing and acting...
: D
18: Describe yourself in three words.
Weird. Nice. .......
19: What do you hate?
A lot of things- heat and humidity are most prevalent at present.
20: If Elmo came into your room with a gun, what would you do?
Say to myself, "WHY AM I HAVING THESE FREAKY DREAMS!!!!" then scream and throw things... ;)

Now, my mom said I cannot tag her anymore! SO I have to come up with ten bloggers, which might be hard, since a lot of them have already received this award, so I might end up with less than ten, hehe.

Ok, I have 6 blogger's whom I interact with enough to have a feeling they have pure hearts. ;)


Lady Scribble
Katherine Sophia
Jo March
Lizzy
Lexi
Loca Chica 

Beautiful Blogger :D

Emily Shae of Thoughts of a Small Town has so graciously awarded me the Beautiful Blogger Award. Thank you SO much, Emily! She definitely deserved/deserves this award.

I award....

Mom @ Grace and Space

Jen and Kat @ Love Unawakened

Just another village wise woman @ Village Wise Woman

Lexi @ Choosing to Wait

Marissa @ A Peek into my Life

Thanks again, Emily!
 

The Elephant, age discrimination, the sweet spot, and the Vikings

Watch the other three parts on Youtube, or here at The Rebelution itself.

While the Sun Set

My Daddy is a hero. He really is. He works at a major printing company, with tons of dangerous machinery. Today, a fire broke out at his job. And he and one other man put it out,but it was only because of my father that they stayed. By putting out the fire, my father (and the other man, G-D bless him) saved dozens, perhaps hundreds of jobs- ensuring the future monetary well being of those who worked at the job.
As my brother told me of what happened, tears came to my eyes- I am so proud of my Daddy. And so glad he wasn't hurt. Nor anyone else.
Yesterday (Shabbat), Daddy went to the field with the dogs. None of us kids wanted to go- my brother was playing video game, and I was watching "Sarah Plain and Tall" with my cousin. After he left, I regretted my desicion- it was a rare oppurtunity to spend some time alone with him. So I got up and walked to the field.
It was definitely worth it ;) After taking some shots of him playing with the dogs (look here), we sat down on the grass and he talked to me of some important things of life. If you didn't know, my father is uncommonly wise and insightful, and I am blessed to have him guiding my life in the direction HaShem wants it to go.

Dear girls, appreciate your father's!!! Though time with them may be scarce, or time alone with them rare, and even if you don't feel like they live up to the standard you or the world, or even our fellow followers of Torah or Yeshua (or both), have set for fathers, love them where they are now, and your reward will be great. This is also good practice for when we have husbands.
Remember, boxes sound and look good, but they can be dangerous. So accept and love your imperfect father, just like HaShem accepts and loves us!

Who Do I Think I Am?

My aunt bought my mom an early mother's day present. It is the documentary, "Who Does She Think She Is?". It is about women being artist's and mother's, instead of having to choose one.
It was a good documentary- the art and women were interesting. Though I do not agree with some things in it, it was informative and inspiring. It inspired me to pursue my art (photography, music and writing) and to do it well.  If you are an artist and mother, or if you want to be an artist and mother, I would recommend watching this if you are intimidated by the world saying you can't.

I have a passion for photography, and sometimes I become discouraged because I see other photographers who are better than me and do such a great job- I don't feel as if I could ever get there. And with my writing and music my confidence is even lower. I think this is because in photography I stepped out, against everything, but I haven't done that with  my writing yet, though blogging is certainly a step out ;) In music, I have done recitals, but now I have to teach myself, and I am afraid of failing. But I'm not trying. So beginning to play again is one of my resolutions for this season of my life, and so is writing a book- I don't know what yet, but I have to write. As for photography, I will continue learning and doing what I love. If I ask myself, "Who do I think I am?", I hope I'll remember the answer- I am a child of G-D! The King!
Be sure to check out my photography blog for my photos of the day. I've been posting here without pictures for quite a while, so here's one ;)

But Before...

 I should probably be sleeping, and I know I'm tired enough, but I'm not ready yet.  I was looking on my Flickr (visit my photography blog-site!!) and uploaded my photos of the day. Before that I was doing a fun tag on my literature blog. Check it out ;) Before that I was posting on my photography blog, and before that I was at my grandmother's house and saw her new cat, Tux- he's adorable, you are super sure to see pictures on my photog blog soon! Before that I went to the park with my mom (see photog blog) and before that I was tending to my room.
This week is going to be crazy. Why? You probably don't want to know, but I'll tell you ;)

• Pesach Cleaning and preparation!!!! My room is first for me- hopefully ;)
• School! of course ;)
• A shoot tomorrow, (Ah!!! I should get to bed!) but I will most likely have to cancel because of the rain. Yes, it's supposed to rain,just because its Monday :(
• If not Monday, a shoot on Wednesday or Thursday.
• Editing and etc.
• Managing my accounts and other business stuff
• And that's it!

Once all the Passover craziness and lovliness is over, there are some things I want to straighten out, schedule and otherwise. I have so many great ideas and projects to work on, plus PSSA's in April! I'm not nervous...yet. :) Spring break is from next Wednesday until the Monday after, but I will have to use some of that time for school, because of taking off on the first and last day of Pesach.

Well, I have to go, but I wish you all a magnificent week! Besides the business, I will enjoy myself, I'm sure. Work is hard, but refreshing after winter. Oh my, and the garden season is fast approaching!
 I enjoyed this ramble- hope you did too- getting a little peek into my life ;)

Blessings,

My Beach Days

   As the first rays of the August sun came in through my bedroom window, I opened my sleepy eyes and looked at the clock. My excitement overcame my drowsiness, as I remembered that today was beach day. We, my mother, brother and I, would go to the beach with my aunt and cousin. I looked at the form of my cousin lying beside me. I didn’t need to wake her, because she was already awake. We spent a few moments sharing our excitement, and then we went downstairs to the dining room and joined the others for breakfast.

     After breakfast everyone was busy changing into their swimsuits and packing entertainment for the long drive to the beach. Soon everyone and everything was in the car, and we began the long trip to Dewey Beach, Delaware. With books and drawing pads (not to mention rocking to music), I wasn’t bored at all. As we finally neared the beach, we passed some interesting sights. We saw the NASCAR racetrack, the Air Force Base, and two historic World War II watchtowers, which overlooked the ocean.
    That was our queue to turn into the Dewey Beach parking lot. We were soon making our way to the shore, carrying our numerous bags and bundles. It looked as if we were a camping group! After a short walk through the deep sand, we found the perfect spot to set down our things. I helped spread out the big blanket we had brought. My aunt stuck the umbrella in the sand, but it only covered a portion big enough for one person. So my mom sat under the umbrella, while the rest of us put on sun block and headed to the water.
    When I approached that beautiful expanse of what looked like sparkling diamonds in some places, I felt a little nervous. Waves three to four feet tall came crashing in at my feet, and I could feel the pull of the sand and water at my feet as the next wave prepared to rise. Seagulls were flying here and there, and the morning sun was beaming above me. I was half tempted to stay on the shore. But I yielded to the stronger temptation and grabbed a boogie board, following my aunt’s instructions on how to use it in the water. After a few tries and failures to ride the waves, I handed the boogie board to my brother, and sat on the sand where the water could reach my feet. My cousin already had a pile of sea shells, and I helped her gather more. Between boogie boarding (or trying to), gathering sea shells, eating lunch, and just enjoying the scenery, I was having a delightful time.
    But then it suddenly became cloudy. A few moments later we heard thunder.  I could see a storm coming towards us from inland. Then I heard the Life Guard blowing his whistle to call the swimmers out of the water. In almost no time we were packed up and on our way back to the car. I was disappointed that we had to leave the beach, but tired enough to consent without much complaining.  On the long trip home, everyone slept (except the driver, of course) and we were soon home.
    But that wasn’t the end of my beach experience. The next week, we repeated our beach day, this time with more success. The sky was clear and the weather was even warmer.  It seemed almost unreal to me that we were at the there for the second time when we hadn’t been to the beach for two years. But I was more than willing to do it again and again.
    This time, I entered the water without hesitation. The storm had brought more rocks and shells to the ocean floor. I spent the day in pretty much the same manner as before, except this time my aunt took my brother and me out beyond the crashes of the waves to where it was calmer and deeper. We had to duck under the big waves and float with the other ones. I was a little afraid of going underneath those 6 foot walls of water, but I liked the thrill it gave me. I’ll never forget it.
    That day ended beautifully with a sight of dolphins jumping in and out of the water. Everyone had a good time, and I had a memorable experience. I could have stayed there until dark. The warm breeze, the beautiful glimmering water, and the sound of it crashing on the sand were what I enjoyed most. Just the sight of that magnificent, uncontrollable force is enough to send shivers down my spine. I hope I never again go too long without experiencing the cool calm and majesty of the beach.

Just in Case...

Just in case you don't see my Love for Literature blog on the sidebar, and the post there, here is a link to some exciting news!