It Hit Me

I woke up this morning at 7, even though I fell asleep a bit after 11pm, so didn't get my full 8 hours of necassary beauty sleep ;)  Anyhow, I decided I'd have my devotional first thing (after donning a sweater and washing my teeth and face) to help me wake up fully and sweetly.The sun was rising and shining very brightly.
Anyway, after saying the Modah Ani this morning, I was thinking about how in my Ohel Sarah Women's Siddur (Artscroll series) it says, " You should wake up with gratitude to G_D for having restored your faculties, and with a lion like resolve to serve your Creator. You should immediately declare-" and then it has the Modeh Ani. I thought about that- well, I'll quote from my devotional journal, in which I wrote it down immediately.

Then my instant thought was , honestly, "OK, I'll do everything orderly and perfect today."

It. hit. me. "What am I thinking?!", I thought. Here is the rest of my revelation from my devotional journal.

I realized that I somehow equate serving HaShem with perfection, and doing things perfectly. I  should be equating it with treating others with love and kindness, and by my kind deeds, but most of all by  my behavior. What I do, how I do it, should be the fruit of my heart, not the other way around.

It is amazing the difference between what you know (above) and what your actual unconscious or conscious mindset is (what I first thought) .  I find that is often the case. But I never really realized, like I did this morning, my mindset in that area. Now that it is in the light, I can recognize it in future, and try to change now. How empowering. I think staying up this morning even though I was tired is one of the best things I have ever done because "the quiet (well, there were birds chirping;) early morning hours" gave G-D a chance to speak to me. Baruch HaShem (praise G-D). I hope this helps someone else :)

I also wanted to share Psalm 34:12-15 with you as well. 

Come, children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of ADONAI. Which of you takes pleasure in living? Who wants a long life to see good things? [if you do] keep your tongue from evil and your lips from deceiving talk. Turn From evil and do good; seek peace, go after it!

In conclusion, here is an excerpt from "The Christian's Secret of a Happy Life" , which I am still reading ( reading = enjoying in this case ;) All these things tie together, I think G-D is speaking to me ;) You're probably thinking, " Um, I think so too- OBVIOUSLY!!!!" :) Please read through it, I know it is long, but its worth it. Again I must note, I am not a Christian, but I do believe in the Messiah Yeshua (whom is known as Jesus).

It is essential, therefore, that our "leadings" should all be tested by the teachings of Scripture. But this alone is not enough. They must be tested as well by our own spiritually enlightened judgment, or what is familiarly called "common sense."

So far as I can see, the Scriptures everywhere make it an essential thing for the children of God, in their journey through this world, to use all the faculties that have been given them. They are to use their outward faculties for their outward walk, and their inward faculties for their inward walk; and they might as well expect to be "kept" from dashing their feet against a stone in the outward, if they walk blindfold, as to be "kept" from spiritual stumbling, if they put aside their judgment and common sense in their interior life.

Some, however, may say here, "But I thought we were not to depend on our Human understanding in Divine things." I answer to this that we are not to depend on our unenlightened human understanding, but upon our human judgment and common sense enlightened by the Spirit of God. That is, God will speak to us through the faculties He has Himself given us, and not independently of them; so that just as we are to use our outward eyes in our outward walk, no matter how full of faith we may be, so also we are to use the interior "eyes of our understanding" in our interior walk with God.

Blessings,